Archive for July, 2008

Yeah yeah, you read it right. Something is coming up. If no BS happens of course…so God-willing nothing would.

On AUGUST 1st & ExACTLY 10 P.M Malaysian time, I will be posting something very important!! (that would be roughly 11 A.M for East-Coast United States I think.)

Not sure if I could tell you guys/gals yet about it though…wouldn’t be a surprise if I did right? Just wanted to ‘make’ an announcement. Just remember the date and time. It’s not like I have more than 10 avid readers here anyways…hehehe..but my homies’ and close buds that have been following this blog; thanks to ya’ll. And Stay TUNED!

MOSTLY thanks to MATT for wordpress, you the MAN!! Blogging…geez…didn’t know it was a whole new ‘transition’ to me from being ‘A’ to being ‘Z’….not bad actually[don’t ask whats’ ‘A’ or ‘Z’, I’m still figuring it out]…blogging didn’t cramp my style at all…didn’t cramp my sex-life either…twas’ fun definitely(both the blogging and the…ya know) haha!!

No, no I’m NOT saying bloggers don’t get laid, its’ quite the opposite actually(to MOST at least). I sound so like a newbie don’t I?..thats’ cause I am!! haha! Not afraid to admit it. Though I DO have a problem with people mocking me though thats’ a different case entirely that I don’t even bother to blog about, people that does the ‘mocking’ are lucky enough to get laid by their cats/dogs; while I am quite satisfied…well…I don’t have any women-problems at all.

Now, now…I don’t kiss and tell so don’t be asking who,what,where and when I got laid. Wait, never mind. No one wants to know anyways.

Sabah Bloggers Meet meet is coming up!! And I just found out there..are…no…arrgh!!..the agony!! Never mind I’m not even going to say it. I just thought they would have ‘it’ but they don’t…hmmm. Maybe I should bring my ‘own’ then? We’ll see…hopefully.

Oh well, time to blog-hop and more editing awaits. Just stay tuned and….don’t drink and drive. Why did I even say that?

Complacency. Stagnant. Uninspired. Procrastination. Not much else comes to mind. But I do know these ‘attributes’ leads to other ‘down-falls’ to the human society. I need not list those out. Its’ not like you’re NOT from planet earth if you’re reading this. Then again who knows, maybe I’m just getting the X-Files ‘vibes’ due to the fact that its next movie is coming out.

A lot of people I know are in this state. Shit, I know I’m one of them but thank God I hit my head on the pavement of a sidewalk one night last December; which included the hard excruciatingly painful sound of a ‘thump’ deep in my soul. And with it, a multitude of ego that was weighing me down and have been rooting me to the ground for so long has suddenly . . .mysteriously. . . disappeared.

It does ‘creep’ its ugly head at me sometimes, but then again I remembered the fucking agonizing ‘thump’ that I received and I beat the fucking hell out of that ‘head’ till it’s gone and crying back home to mama. Because I know if that ‘head’ crept up and stayed around too long, I might get ‘reacquainted’ with it and the whole bullshit ‘routine’ would sink into me again. Which was obviously un-fucking-‘ceptable!!

The ‘routine’ was shattered and all that is left was an empty husk of a creature among the billions in this world. Just another speck of life, yes; there is still life ‘beating’ inside that empty husk. That beaten and trodden-down shell of a man. And it walks and breathes like he never did. EVER!

It’s funny how sometimes humans need a little ‘push’ to drive them forward. Sometimes it takes a new love, a new friend or even a soul mate. Sometimes it takes a new Audi A4 to literally move you forward!(you know who you are you lucky bastard!) and then some just needs a little ‘guidance’. Though that guidance could be misinterpreted as a sign of ‘judgment’. In other words, one might feel ‘judged’ as being weak because someone or something is helping them to move forward in life. Well don’t!

Everyone is weak one way or another. I learned that you ‘need’ to show your weakness once in a blue moon just to let those very close to you know, that you are only…human. We all are. And in seeing that, they too might learn to be human themselves. Some people thinks that they are above the law, some thinks that fucking up a foreign country is for the betterment of their future and some would even go as far as ‘thinking’ that they don’t need to feel anything in this world in order to be human.

I learned it the hard way, painful way, the best way. The best lessons in life are the ones where you have your ego, self-centeredness and ignorant attitude towards life/people; crushed within minutes and seconds. And at that point you wonder to yourself, ‘Where or what the fuck was I doing all those years?’. Maybe not exactly those words but somewhat close to that.

I’m not telling you to get a life. I am asking though, are you that so much happy in your current state that you do not pursue your dreams or do not wish to alter your routines in life simply because you’re afraid that the very skies will start crumbling down upon you? Would you not see it through this life with a brand new cycle, not like the same 24/7 bullshit you have to put up with right now?

Get inspired! Seize the moment! Go commando if thats’ your thing! Unless you have the blood of an Immortal running through your veins, you know you only have one shot at life. Never stop moving and never tire to improve your standards, set the bars higher than before. Fuck the normal standards that people simply put up with just because they were ‘programmed’ to accept it since the day they were born. Fuck it!!

So whatever your cup of tea is, splash something else other than lemon.(I hear honey is good.) May it be that 4000 dollar DSLR, that MacBook Pro you’ve been wet-dreaming since it was first announced or that new condo/house which you and ONLY you own and live in which you could turn into a cluster-fuck party of chicks walking in and out of your bed(or bathroom, garage, kitchen table, etc) without a care in the world. Tired and hungry from all the extra curricular activities involved of course.

So whatever or however you do it, make sure you look up the words up at the first paragraph in the dictionary. And ‘reprogram’ yourself day in and day out to do the OPPOSITE! Nothing is constant in life except Time…and Death. Unless you are ‘related’ to Grim Reaper himself then you might have no worries at all.

I’m not saying my life is perfect. Shit! Far from it, but even farther than being rooted to the fucking ground and not doing anything about it! It’s a journey. And as all journeys it will take more than just time, It will take perseverance, persistence, enthusiasm and patience.

And if possible don’t do it alone. I’m not asking you to get married or confess your love to the ‘next-best-thing/table-scraps’ or anything like that. Family and friends does come to mind, why don’t start from there eh?

1. to inspire or possess with a foolish or unreasoning passion, as of love.

2. to affect with folly; make foolish or fatuous.

Infatuation. believe it or not I even went through the trouble of looking it up the dictionary. It has so many other synonyms to it too such as attachment, craze, crush, fascination, folly, madness, love, obsession or passion, etc…

You know what I’m talking about. The way s/he plays with her hair, the way s/he laughs, how s/he leaves your vicinity and you can’t help but feel…well…’off’ …off to another place where you wish you could follow her to where ever she goes.

I’m not about to talk about something I already blogged about(Shit, how many ’round-a-bouts’ did I do?). Yes, there are similarities but….well..this is kinda’ ‘new’. Weird thing is….its so…well….Fuckin’ weird’ to me. Yes, its happening..again.., but this time..its…different?..maybe. It’s not fuckin’ weird in a Bad way,..actually its fuckin’ weird in a Good kinda way…Nice actually…the kinda’ nice that puts a ‘smile’ deep down inside….another weird thing is…I can’t even say that it’s the kinda ‘thing’ that drives you mad or obsessive. Not the kinda’ smile the Joker would put though…that’s like psychotic kinda ‘weird’ isn’t it?

Don’t get me wrong…I’ve had my share of women lately,..recently even, nothing ‘weird’ about them, just..niiiiiceeee, …but ‘this’ one doesn’t feel like a fling, doesn’t feel like a ‘deep-emo-love-crap’ either…something in-between then?..maybe. why does THIS one feels…hmm…’weird’? Yeah, a cycle of words here. Okay,…more like it feels ‘different’ or ‘bizarre’…God sake’s no, its’ NOT love. NOT. All in caps. Read it again. NOT LOVE.

Love, pfft. All too familiar with it actually. Felt it one too many times and can’t be bothered with it any more. Its possibly because I gave the key to my heart and soul to Lucifer and let em’ have it; not gonna fucking need it till maybe…Oh I don’t know, December next year if I get to see next year.

Let me see, why do I call it ‘weird’/’different’…hmm…how bout’ : cause simply don’t even KNOW this person. Yeah, I mean the least that one should do is at least know a person to even have anything as close to an infatuation isn’t it? Actually I don’t even know whether ‘infatuation’ is even the proper word to describe this ‘phenomenon’.

Usual questions that you’d get from your friends would be like, ‘What do you like about him/her?’- Don’t know.., or ‘What does she do?’-also, Don’t know, or ‘Did you ‘tap’ that?’-WTF?!…ok, ‘screw’ the last question; some friends can be real assholes, haha!! See, the thing is, don’t really ‘feel’ it deep down the ‘groin’ kinda feeling . So, why does THIS one…hmm…*thinking.. and yes you get questions like, ‘Who is she?’- naaah, you’d like to know don’t ‘you’.. 😛

This sounds more like a ‘personal’ journal rather than a blog and should be kept under ‘private-post’ doesn’t it? But where’s the FUN in that?!. And yes please do come in and ‘bash’ me if you’d like to, I haven’t blogged or read any comments for a long..long…loooooooong yes come in and ‘enjoy’ my little acrimonious mind if you wish. Screw it, its not like I’m famous or anything so whoever is reading this would go,”Crap! Shoulda’ wasted my time on Digg or; this is BS!!’.

Simply trying to understand it, heck, more like doing a ‘friend’ a favor and doing the ‘ask-the-public-for-input’ kinda thing here too. Don’t know her quirks or perks or attitude. It doesn’t feel lovey-dovey-dreamy-like when talking to her. Can’t say dreaming about her day or night either. Don’t feel like pulling the chair for her when she sits down or open the door for her. Won’t jump down the Niagra falls for her…. Shite, should I even click ‘Publish’…

Anyhoo, yes; everyone in the ‘circle’ would be blogging about The Dark Knight, and here I am bloggin’ about THIS…Yes, yes, The Joker was awesome, and yes, yes I do sound like a ‘school-boy’. Blah,blah this and blah,blah that. If you wanted literature then you’re on the wrong site/blog dude…maybe I just wanted some ‘hits’ on the blog,..poor me, boo hoo hoo. LOL!

Why so serious? I’m not…just ‘feeling’ very, very….off at the moment. Maybe it’s The Game trying to test-out ‘new’ kinda ‘flavors‘ out there?- Don’t know either…so..till I find the answer(s)… Peace out!

P.S: If somehow halfway (or 1st paragraph) reading this you still have NO IDEA whatsoever what this blog is about, guess what : I haven’t the slightest clue of what crap I blogged about either. I know this isn’t going to comfort you, but I didn’t say I’m gonna ‘clarify’ it for you either. 🙂